I have been following the debate that the Supreme Court is going through as well as the debates that have been on Facebook about marriage and the definition of marriage. Certainly there have been many who have expressed their positions regarding whether or not same sex partners should be allowed to have the same rights and privileges that opposite sex partners have. While I respect differing opinions of this issue, I believe that all who are in a committed relationship should be afforded equal rights.
What concerned me most was a comment about children and the idea that if they are in a family with opposite sex parents that they will thrive better. This harkens back to social research that is at least 40 years old that stated that a child does better in a two parent household with the role models of both parents. The premise of such research was that the effect of single parents or parents who were both working could not provide the needed role models that children need in their early development. In fact, the research at that time suggested that it was important for the mother to remain home for the first five years of a child’s life.
The flaw of that research then as well as now is the assumption that there is a single causal effect regarding child development. The reality is that there are many causal effects regarding child growth physically, psychologically, and spiritually. I believe the greatest causal effect on children is not whether they have a two parent family of opposite or same sex parents, a single parent, or being raised in extended families but the one effect that most creates issues is poverty. When children do not have the resources for adequate nutrition, health care, opportunities for education, and the support of a loving community, they will not develop as well for the most part. I know that there are exceptions to every situation and that there are other causal factors such as exposure to pollutants that are equally devastating. Yet, research continually points out the effects of malnutrition and untreated childhood diseases effect the greatest number of children throughout the world and even in our own nation.
Add on to this the growing violence that effects the morbidity rates of childhood deaths and we have an epidemic that touches children the most. If we really wanted to do something for our children, we would be concerned about justice that is scripturally both Hebrew and Christian scriptures. We are mandated to care for the widows and the orphans or today for our children. We need to support families regardless of their make up to provide the resources that children needs.
An example in my experience when I worked for the social services in Omaha, was a grandmother who was raising her five grand children. She was illiterate as she never was allowed to receive the same education of the more privileged. She was dependent on welfare to provide the minimum resources to raise these children. What was remarkable despite the limitations that she faced with no job skills, no education was that she made sure that all the grand children completed high school and that all attended either college or vocational school. I marveled at her resilience to deal with the limitations that she faced. She was also the model of hospitality that whenever I visited her, she always provided refreshments. I believe that much of her success was the fact that she was active in a loving church community that truly believed in the idea that we are a community to support all people regardless of who they are and their situation.
Whether or not one is accepting of gay or lesbian marriage, should we not be more concerned about providing the support and resources that children of families have the basic necessities of life. For truly then “when we do for the least of them, we do it for Christ.”
